Sunshine

Sitting outside watching the sun go down (and hearing about 10 different starts to Emmerdale through peoples open windows!) I am very pensive tbh, I don't know why but always get like this before I age another year!

I always think what happens when you die? You hear so many stories of it being a place with flowers where you seem to fly. When you watch these medium programmes 'spirits' come through to talk and they are wearing clothes or have fave items with them. I find it all very bizarre, dunno why I am thinking like this, feel drained......

I always seem to do a year review just before my birthday, seeing what happened within the last year. (normally in my head tho lol)

Max (dog)

Lost Max in October, never forget it. She just seemed to start bleeding from her womb and the next thing we know she is gone. The last time I saw her she was full of energy and jumping to give you a kiss, then she was struggling to stay alive. To have her fall to sleep in my arms was terrible. It was a difficult decision to make but she had no quality of life and she was very weak.

Dad

Lost me dad in August last year, had only just started speaking to him again after about 10 years. I was supposed to be going to see him in hospital on one particular evening but I didn't go and then he passed away the day after. I regret not going to see him when I should have. The funeral was very sad, I had just got to know me dad again and he was gone. Typical eh....

Alfie

After Max passed away it didn't feel right to not have a dog, we visited a rescue home and saw Zammo (renamed to Alfie, was the name the rescue centre gave him) We just got to him before an elderly chap did otherwise we may have missed out on him. Alfie is instantly delicious and the fact that someone dumped him on the streets made it more stronger to use a rescue home and give them another chance. He loves to kiss you and has made a wonderful little chap, a bit of a nightmare on the lead but thats maybe due to the way he was in the past as we know very little about the 1 year (he was 1 when we had him) he had before he was dumped on the street.

He's not my little girl but he is a close match.